One is the lonliest number

The hardest part of this adventure for me, so far, has been dealing with the loneliness. It is the challenge of being in a house but not of the house. It is further compounded by not really having my own space here. My room is lovely, do not get me wrong; however, I am still a boarder.

I am not nearly pulled as thin as Denver. The stress of the education and people process out there was very different than here in LI. Also, there is more of a routine here. In Denver, we never knew what we were up for the evening until the end of the day. Plans really all depended on the day's experiences and our need to cope with them.

Here, I end up retreating through technology back to the places I love. My room is suddenly transformed into my living room or a back yard deck with a web cam and cell phone. I can even help ma chère with nightly devotions with the boys. Not a typical functional family, but it works as a temporary solution.

Wish you would step back from that ledge, my friend

This is terribly unusual for me. However, it fits the mold. I have a friend who might be in over their head. It involves substance abuse and the substance being used is crack cocaine.

Crack is a derivative of cocaine. The chemical make-up of cocaine is modified by putting the cocaine in a liquid baking soda mixture to unlock non-high inducing aspects from the base. This mixture is cooked down, a reduction of sorts to remove the liquid. The cake is then broken up into individual pieces or "rocks". This creates a highly concentrated drug with some moisture left in it. The name "crack" refers to the sound the rock makes as the moisture is steamed out. The added benefit is the rocks can be smoked instead of being inhaled through the nasal passages or injected, like other forms of cocaine. If you do not like needles or are afraid your septum will deteriorate over time, this is a great drug. Approximately 2% of the United States population over age 11 uses some form of cocaine.

The high from smoking crack starts in less than a minute and lasts approximately 10-15 minutes. The intensity and duration of the high lessens after each use. Crack's addictive qualities are nearly immediate. Statistics show that as many as 1 in 5 users of crack become chronic users after their first use. Continued use increases the risk of addiction. One possible reason for this is explained by how the drug induces a high. The drug inhibits the body's ability to process dopamine. This is a chemical in the body that regulates brain activity. It appears that the drug not only inhibits the processing of dopamine, it also changes the body's balance, sort of re-calibrating what the brain thinks the natural level of dopamine should be.

This isn't a corny email plea to pass on to 5 of your friends. Just send out some kind thoughts or a hopeful prayer. Worst case, we've spread a little sunshine. Also, if you are a parent, please talk to your children about this drug. Give them all the information they need to make an informed decision. They need to understand why they are saying "no". There are a ton of resources available on the web. Let Google do the walking for you.

Cigarettes and Chocolate Milk

The time alternates between fast forward and slow motion. A day can feel like a week and then a real week is finished.

We had another candidate in over last weekend. That meant another long week, though I knocked off around 1 p.m. on Saturday and worked from a great little coffee shop in Westhampton Beach. The task sheets for the first floor are all but complete. The tricky part will be to get the work scheduled into a reasonable amount of time and scheduled around the times the principals are not in the spaces.

I managed to get tickets to the Rufus Wainwright concert in Westhampton Beach on Saturday night. Rufus was everything I expected and more. He is flamboyantly gay, has an incredible voice and somehow manages to keep his vocal range during a live performance. The band was in mis-matched stripes. Rufus was in an over-the-top red and white striped suit jacket and slacks. He covered a lot from his latest album, though he managed a Judi Garland set before the intermission. His first encore, "Hallelujah", was a duet with his sister. The second piece was done a la Judi/Liza complete with choreography in tux jacket, black stockings and heels. Who knew he had great gams? He's in Milwaukee next Monday. Check him out if you have time.

Sunday found me taking the candidate to the airport at 5 a.m. I am looking forward to just one of 2 things. 2 days off or sleeping past 5 a.m. on my day off. No complaints, really, it is just the nature of the business.

I toured the south fork of Long Island on Sunday. I drove through Sag Harbor and saw the mega-yachts moored there. I also drove through East Hampton and South Hampton. Think Dells without salt water taffy and moccasins but with Tiffany's & Ralph Lauren instead. Oh, and hold the water parks, think polo fields. I was pretty beat and ended up at the Quogue Village beach later in the afternoon despite the 70 degree overcast weather. No improvement to my tan, but the nap helped.

I am settling into the routine of the house better this week. I cooked quite a bit early in the week, which was fun. We are also making improvements to the housekeeping standards and getting service to our standards from the contract staff.

I will be flying home Friday afternoon for a much needed visit with the family. I was right that this stay would be easier than Denver. However, I am looking forward to seeing ma chère and the Things, sleep in my bed and be in my space for a bit. We have things going on all weekend, but would love to fit more visits in. Call ma chère. It will be a long weekend so I will get to see the boys off for their first day of school on Monday before my flight out.

There is nothing new on the placement front. That is not to say nothing is happening, just nothing tangible. There remains a lot of "in a couple weeks" stories. It is frustrating, to be sure.

As you can imagine, I am getting more and more anxious. I will get paid for this assignment, eventually. The pay is not near enough to float all our bills and nothing near what I should be making in a permanent placement. The bogeymen are no longer hiding under the bed. I am expecting them to come knocking on the door in a few more weeks. I continue to be confident it will all work out for the best. Head up, shoulders back, sure steps forward.

I will try to get back in the routine of smaller posts. I will change to posting in the morning. It seems to be when I am most creative. I have had a bunch of ideas, but by day's end I'm too tired to do anything about it. Ciao for now.

New York, New York

The weekend came and went with little ado. The Ps had an overnight guest for part of the weekend. He was an HM in for a day of interviewing. He was a rather nice gentleman and brought plenty of skills to the position.

After dropping the candidate off at Long Island Mc Arthur Airport, I had the rest of Sunday off. I worked 6 days last week in order to bank a day for a long weekend at home in a few weeks. It was a much needed and deserved day off. I drove up the north coast of Long Island to land's end on the North Fork, a town called Orient. The geography and wildlife is like a very flat Wisconsin.

We traveled into NYC yesterday. One reason was to let me see the city apartment. It gives me a better understanding of what is out there and what needs to be done to keep that property up to standards.

It was interesting being back in a city again. It has been 6 weeks since I was with any population size of note. It took awhile to dampen all the sensory input. I spend a couple of hours wandering down 5th Avenue over to Times Square and back up 6th Avenue to Central Park. I seem to take that same walk every time I am in NYC. Unfortunately, the trip only served to remind me how much there really is to do downtown, uptown, etc.

Dark Blue

Things have been busy the past few days. The first two days were long. Yesterday was hectic with vendors and coordinating with my principals. Nothing I can't handle, mind you. It just takes a few days to get my engines back up to full steam; a 4 week vacation might do that to most people.

My principals are wonderful people. Mr & Mrs P are a lovely couple. Out of respect for them, this will be the last mention of them. As I stated before, privacy is not an option.

I am continuing my work on documenting the rhythm of the house to identify what can and should be done, when and how often. The work tends towards detailed analytics and the struggle is to not get to pedantic. (I LOVE THAT WORD!) There are also a bunch of projects that need to be captured, prioritized and executed. Put into that a wholesome mix of daily graces, admin & culinary work and, voilà, it is a full time job. Oh, and don't forget my 2 newest New Best Friends, the dogs. Not exactly gentlemen, but they are rather cute. It's like having Things 2 & 3 around all day.

On The Road Again

The title really is cliché, I know. In my defense, however, it is 5:15 AM and I am already at the airport. I am a mixture of nerves and confidence. Sometimes, I am just barely brave enough to pull these things off. The moments of self-doubt burble up.
"Psst, why don't you crawl back in bed? Or, better yet, back under your rock?"
"Go away, I'm up, I might as well see this through."

I, shamelessly, sent a text to ma chère this morning when I got up.
CM: "Today is the beginning of our next great adventure. I am very glad you are my best and closest traveling companion. I love you."
MC: "Let us begin. I love you. Go with God. Don't forget your choes. Perhaps you should take a bath towel as well!"

Thanks, Mr. Adams, you can still make me laugh until I cry. Next stop is New York. Where did I put that Guide?

I'm On My Way

I am being given the opportunity to validate my decision to change careers. Arrangements have been made for a temporary placement with a principal out east. I will primarily be assisting the Lady-of-the-House in creating the House Manager's Book for their 2 properties plus the standard "other duties as assigned". I will be out there for a few weeks, until a permanent House Manager is available. My flight leaves early Monday morning. I should arrive at the house mid-afternoon.

I usually try very hard to not build expectations. I have found that a blank slate is not easily disappointed. I have just the barest of information regarding the principals; probably less than they know about me. However, seeing that I have never even talked to them, I am impressed with their trust and conviction in Starkey. A total stranger will be serving their guests and living under their roof starting Monday afternoon.

Of course, the location means more time away from ma chère and the Things. This trip should be easier, though. To begin with, we have had significant practice in the recent past. In addition, it will be possible for me to head for home on the occasional weekend if need be. Back to school will be rough, but we will stay on top of it. Besides, after spending the last 4 weeks with Dad, the Things might appreciate a break from the old ogre.

You Can Do It

Thoughts for self-motivation:

• I know this is the right direction.


• I am doing this, now, because this is what I am supposed to be doing.


• I must trust the process. Patience will prevail.


• Stay focused on the original goal. (A little voice asks, "What was the original goal?" Hmm, I seem to have forgotten to write that one down. Point taken, you must document your goals. "As you think, so you create." It only works if you've written it down somewhere.)

I once had the opportunity to hear Frank Lloyd Wright's son speak a few years ago. He gave an insightful quote that he credited to his father that I will paraphrase, "Worry about the details, everything else will follow." It is such a stretch for me to even imagine how to do that; however, it remains a goal. I tend towards the general; I paint in broad strokes. I will continue to believe that the details of this endeavor will work themselves out.

Yes, I am trying just as hard to convince you as myself. There is no sin in doubting your faith, only in losing it.

Walking On Broken Glass

The placement saga continues. I mentioned to some that there was an excellent position in the pipe. Unfortunately, it did not work out. I am waiting for news on a temporary position in the field that should last until the middle or end of September. Please keep us in your thoughts and prayers. It will be good to get out and use my training and experience. Hopefully, something will turn around before the end of the assignment.